pain in the neck

on saturday i was at the gym, on the exercise bike, when i went to wipe my forehead with a towel and a little “ping!” went off in my neck.

i’ve been in bed since then. i can barely move my head.

now, normally this would be a dream come true… lying around all day…

but i’m getting sick of staring at the ceiling.

seriously, this sucks ass.

to use my laptop, i’ve got it propped up over my head, and typing is a bit of a feat… (to really hit this point home, i’m excluding the use of capitol letters, so it will seem as if i am in such agonizing pain, i can’t even hit the shift key)

(except to make brackets)

i curse my neck. i curse it!

i’m glad i bought the classic 39 episodes of the honeymooners last week… i’ve burned through most of them.

audrey meadows (alice) should have been a bigger star than lucy, if you ask me. talk about deadpan. that woman had talent.

and she was foxy to boot.

i think i’m going a little squirrely here.


The Farmer says, “The CBC says No”

So, after two very long years of development (one year with the old regime, one with the new), the CBC finally gave me their answer regarding my television pilot. It was, “No”.

I’m not going to go into too many details, but I will say that they felt that the “target audience” for this show was not an “audience” they intend on “targeting”; They don’t want to “target” a “younger audience”.

Which is ironic since the show isn’t targeting a younger audience.

Just because there are teenagers in the show doesn’t mean that the show is about teenagers.

It’s like saying the key demo for Babar was elephants aged 0-7. Which maybe it was, and maybe why it’s not on the air anymore.

(I miss Babar)

I’d be lying if i said that I wasn’t disappointed.

I’d be lying if i said that I didn’t think they weren’t being short sighted about their decision.

The last few months have been particularly long. They’ve kept me in the dark, they’ve kept me guessing and second guessing what was going to happen.

For the most part, I’d chalk it up to being part of the business.

I’m not going to let this dictate how I feel about myself or my writing abilities, because I trust the people who’ve read it… I work with the best in the business.

Here’s the strange thing… I’m actually kind of relieved.

My producer and story editor (the best in the business) were both more shocked about the news than I was. I’m not an optimist, I saw this coming. So I’m not shocked.

I’m not going to wallow, or try to figure out what went wrong. The only thing I can do is learn from this experience and move forward.

And to be honest, I’ve been needing to move on from this for a while. I’ve been spinning my wheels waiting for an answer. I’ve been unable to concentrate on any other projects because, well, I spent two years focused on this…

So, what do I do now?

First we get all the money we’re owed, then we get the rights back and then finally we pitch it to someone else…

In the meantime, I can get back to writing.

Probably not television, tho.

Not for a while, anyway.


Matthew waits…

I spend about 80% of my time waiting. I’ve figured it out. I know math.

I’ve been working on this pilot for CBC Television for almost two years now… I’m factoring (that’s a math expression) in the year that was lost with the old head of drama…

Over the last year, i’ve handed in draft after draft… And now we come to the hardest part of all of this.

There’s a very slim chance that this pilot could get shot before the end of the year.

It’s not just this project that I’m waiting to hear on. I’ve also got in something with the radio drama department… I’m waiting to hear about that…

So, I’m waiting… It seems like I’m always waiting… For “people to make decisions”.

That’s the worst of it. If you’re waiting for a friend or a bus or something, it’s different… I don’t know why, maybe because you’r only waiting for minutes… not weeks or months.

But “people making decisions” that’s tougher, I think. You know, people reading your stuff… Thinking it over. Taking their time. Or not. Not reading it until the last minute, but still making you wait.

I dunno, maybe i’m being overly dramatic.

I’m spending a lot of time reflecting on my life, these days, as i wait… and i realize that i’ve spent a lot of time waiting, and being bored.

fuck i hate being bored.

I should probably spend my time working on something else… You know, write some other project so that if/when I get my answer, and it’s “NO” (which i’ve calculated out to be a risk factor of 8 – i know math) then I have something else to work on… But for some reason, this last project has taken up so much of my time and energy and shit, that I’m not really inspired to work on anything else.

you know what i’m also waiting for?

to get paid.

that’s a whole other kind of suck.


In Defense of The One and The CBC

Ok, by now everyone knows that ABC has cancelled The One. So, everyone can say a collective, “I told you so” to the CBC... But come on, that’s too easy and I would think be beneath most people… (“most” meaning everyone except The Globe who is far too happy to rub CBC’s nose in this… btw did you know that The Globe has the same parent company as CTV? Gee, no bias there.)

Anyway, here’s my argument for CBC, and for The One:

Reality Television is a total gamble. When CTV first started airing Idol, everyone shouted that this was the end of quality television and that we’d sunk to a new low. Now that Canadian Idol is so successful, those shouts are now the mumbles of out of work writers like me… Seriously, reality television is killing writers.

CBC took a risk, and yeah, they took a risk with public money. But I remember people chastising the CBC for PASSING on Idol in the first place (yeah, that’s right, CBC had first dibs) when it turned out to be such a huge success.

At least they took the risk.

Everyone is far too quick to jump all over the CBC for making bad decisions, when no one is actually praising them for finally MAKING DECISIONS.

Let them fail, and let them learn from their failures.

No one should lose their job for making a bad decision. If they make five, then maybe… but this is one bad decision. Look, from someone who just witnessed a huge regime change, all I’m saying is, “they’re new, give them some more time”.

Next time, they could have a hit.

(And yes, I’m ignoring the whole, “should CBC be chasing ratings” debate. I’m of the mindset that NO, they shouldn’t but that’s a whole other thing.)